Hops and Box Office Flops

Deadbeat at Dawn – Straight Outta Dayton

Deadbeat at Dawn is essentially a student film. Jim Van Bebber, Chumpzilla's childhood neighbor, dropped out of college and used his student loans to fund it. It's unapologetic exploitation cinema from the warped mind of Van Bebber, and it is glorious.
It's violent, obscene, odd, overwritten, and surprisingly boasts action scenes that outshine crap we've done on the pod from far more expensive movies. It's sort of shocking how well done some of it is.
Thus, there's no denying that Deadbeat at Dawn, which cost roughly $10,000, does display Van Bebber's talent. That said, it is also just sort of a bizarre mishmash of better films—Death Wish and The Warriors, for example.
But, hey, you could watch those, but neither of them feature Bone Crusher! He hates people, man; and he doesn't give a shit about nothing!
So sit back, smash a Miller High Life over Danny's head, and grab your nunchuks! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Capt. Cash, Mayor McCheese, and Chumpzilla are rumbling with the Spiders at the old cemetery!
This Week’s Segments:
Introduction/Plot Breakdown – He quit the gangs. They killed his girl. He became ... Deadbeat at Dawn! (00:00)
Lingering Questions – We hear from our brothers in beer at Hop Nation USA and then tackle the important questions, such as: Who's the best side character? And why is it clearly Bone Crusher? (35:25)
The "No ... I Loved Her" Trivia Challenge – The Double Turn Podcast cashes in Money in the Bank, and then Chumpzilla challenges the field to trivia about the movie. (51:08)
Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We continue "Hops and Hometown Flops" at the Double Deuce with Road House! (1:02:56)
And, as always, hit us up on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram to check out all the interesting factoids—the legend of Jim Van Bebber and more—from this week’s episode!
You can find this episode of Hops and Box Office Flops on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, Podbean, Spotify, Acast, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Vurbl, and Amazon Music!

The Matrix Resurrections – Face-Zucker-Suck

The Matrix Resurrections ushers us back into the false and hollow reality that is the Matrix. It's been 18 years since we've entered the virtual dystopia. And the last time we were thrust into its oppressive confines, the results were less than stellar.
1999's original two sequels sort of divided general audiences. The visuals and exceptional stunts were still there, but the message was lost in translation.
As for The Matrix Resurrections, it is not the hit the first one was, but it's certainly not the other two either. It goes back more to the basics, centering the story around the inextricable bond between Neo (Keanu Reeves) and Trinity (Carrie-Anne Moss).
This, of course, is surrounded by biting and often effective musings about the state of studio cinema, the emergent dangers of the online landscape, and the penchant for too many among us to never question the evils they are being spoon fed.
Twenty-two years on, it turns out, not much has changed for the better. And though Lana Wachowski's message has shifted to recognize its inspirations own metamorphosis, there still isn't all that much new here.
The fight choreography—fun in spurts—lags behind its predecessors and the overall conceit can never match the highs of when it first debuted.
Yet despite its flaws, The Matrix Resurrections is still a trip down the (white) rabbit hole well worth taking. There just aren't many $190 million movies willing to defy audience expectations and be as unabashedly forward as this film is.
Hence, it's time to fly! So sit back, follow the Red Hare to some 2Hazy5 IPA, and free your mind! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Capt. Cash, and Chumpzilla are grappling with the awesomeness of knowing Kung Fu!
This Week’s Segments:
Introduction/Plot Breakdown – After 18 years, Lana Wachowski returns with a deeply personal story within the world she helped create. (00:00)
Spoiler warning: 27:08–48:48.
Lingering Questions – We hear from our brothers in beer at Hop Nation USA and assess where Resurrections stacks up compared to the rest of the series. (48:48)
The "Red Pill" Trivia Challenge – The Double Turn Podcast achieves their dreams of tag team stardom in the virtual world, and then Chumpzilla challenges the field to trivia about the movie. (1:15:49)
Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We kick off "Hops and Hometown Flops" with a film near and dear to Chumpzilla's heart Deadbeat at Dawn! (1:23:44)
And, as always, hit us up on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram to check out all the interesting factoids—why certain actors didn't return and more—from this week’s episode!
You can find this episode of Hops and Box Office Flops on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, Podbean, Spotify, Acast, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Vurbl, and Amazon Music!

End of Days – Satan’s a Choir Boy Compared to Arnold

End of Days was Arnold Schwarzenegger's triumphant return to the big screen after a two-year hiatus. Suffice to say, it was an odd choice of comebacks.
End of Days centers around Satan's quest to bring about, well, the end of days by consummating his relationship with the woman destined to be the mother of his child.
It certainly has action scenes, but it's more religious horror than anything else—unfamiliar fare for Arnold. The fisticuffs and shooting it does contain are a little underwhelming, as are its scarier elements.
Basically, the film has an identity crisis, so despite my love for it—which I admit is rooted deeply in it being a guilty pleasure—it was not well received upon its release.
End of Days was ravaged by critics. It sits at 11% on Rotten Tomatoes with 102 reviews; and although it had a box office haul of $212 million worldwide (only $66.9 million domestically), its hefty $100 million price tag hurt its chances of being a hit.
But, hey, it's Arnold going toe-to-toe with the Antichrist! So sit back, drink to forget with some 805 from Firestone Walker Brewing, and get ready to dance with the Devil! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Mayor McCheese, and Chumpzilla are fist-fighting Satan's goon squad in the rain-soaked streets of NYC!
This Week’s Segments:
Introduction/Plot Breakdown – Arnold versus Satan? Sounds like a win to me! (00:00)
Lingering Questions – We hear from our brothers in beer at Hop Nation USA and then determine what worked and didn't work about Arnold's big return. (39:22)
The "Now, You're Playing with Power" Trivia Challenge – The Double Turn Podcast buries the Devil alive, and then I challenge the field to trivia about the movie. (58:00)
Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We kick off Season 4 by taking the red pill with The Matrix Resurrections! (1:08:17)
And, as always, hit us up on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram to check out all the interesting factoids—the glut of Devil-related movies in this time period and more—from this week’s episode!
You can find this episode of Hops and Box Office Flops on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, Podbean, Spotify, Acast, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Vurbl, and Amazon Music!

8-Bit Christmas – Super Merry-o

8-Bit Christmas chronicles a boy's quest to get a Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) for Christmas in 1988. That plot evokes memories of both A Christmas Story—which it clearly pays homage to—and How I Met Your Mother—a show also starring one Neil Patrick Harris.
As a more modern take on the familiar tale of a child's quest to attain what his parents are reluctant to get, 8-Bit Christmas doesn't feel entirely fresh; but that doesn't make it any less fun or nostalgic for those who grew up grinding away on the NES.
This is a film built for kids of the 80s. Yet it also has a spirit of adventure sure to please the younger crowd. Its reviews—81% on Rotten Tomatoes with 27 of them—point to those attributes.
That said, this movie won't be for everybody. It certainly wasn't everyone on the podcast's cup of tea. But, unlike the Power Glove, it doesn't suck. And who doesn't love shopping mall hijinks, projectile vomiting, and using Billy Ripken as a crucial plot point?
Now sit back, reminisce over a couple of O'Fallon Dad's Oatmeal Cookie Stouts, and ready player two! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Capt. Cash, and Chumpzilla are buying black market Cabbage Patch Kids to appease our children!
This Week’s Segments:
Introduction/Plot Breakdown – An epic quest for an NES? What's not to like? (00:00)
Lingering Questions – We hear from our brothers in beer at Hop Nation USA and then share some of our favorite NES/video game memories. (27:31)
The "Now, You're Playing with Power" Trivia Challenge – The Double Turn Podcast puts in a cheat code for unlimited finishing moves, and then I challenge the field to trivia about the original NES. (49:15)
Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We finish off "Hops and Jingle Bell Flops" by ringing in the New Year with Satan's wrath and the End of Days! (1:03:52)
And, as always, hit us up on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram to check out all the interesting factoids—a boat load of NES trivia and more—from this week’s episode!
You can find this episode of Hops and Box Office Flops on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, Podbean, Spotify, Acast, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Vurbl, and Amazon Music!

Out Cold – Playboy Bunny Slope

Out Cold is like someone spliced Caddyshack and Mallrats. In principle, that sounds awesome, right?
Well, unfortunately, that's more in terms of concept—a group of shiftless park rats bumming around their place of work—and the presence of a London brother. In Out Cold, it's Jason, rather than Jeremy.
I guess there's slightly more to it. They do have to save their fledgling ski resort from an evil corporate stooge, John Majors (played by the legendary Lee Majors, how clever). And there's a baffling love triangle that makes less than a semblance of sense.
If this sounds too harsh, I apologize. After all, this wonderful film does contain a polar bear licking salt off someone's balls; that same someone having sex with a whirlpool jet; and a mechanical bull appearing to climax during a rough ride. I'd say the 90s were a lawless time, but this came out in 2001.
Anyway, sit back, chug some Christmas Ale from Great Lakes Brewing Co., and hit the slopes! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Mayor McCheese, Capt. Cash, and Chumpzilla are shredding some fresh gnar sans pants to determine who's King of the Mountain!
This Week’s Segments:
Introduction/Plot Breakdown – Snowboards, female objectification, dated jokes, and booze. (00:00)
Lingering Questions – The Double Turn Podcast breaks a snowboard like it's a table, and then we discuss whether or not there is actual comedy in this movie. (29:48)
The "King of the Mountain" Trivia Challenge – We hear from our brothers in beer at Hop Nation USA, and then Mayor McCheese challenges the field to trivia about the movie. (44:22)
Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We continue "Hops and Jingle Bell Flops" with a a video game quest that echoed a familiar pursuit of my own childhood 8-Bit Christmas! (51:47)
And, as always, hit us up on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram to check out all the interesting factoids from this week’s episode!
You can find this episode of Hops and Box Office Flops on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, Podbean, Spotify, Acast, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Vurbl, and Amazon Music!

Home Sweet Home Alone – Make It Stop

Home Sweet Home Alone is the epitome of a lazy, soulless rehash; and, quite frankly, it is the antithesis of how you leverage a valuable IP.
Disney should be ashamed. With their abundance of resources, they trotted out not only one of the worst films of the year, it's one of the worst of the decade. Home Sweet Home Alone is never funny. It is quite often painful, though, and that's not including the myriad of death traps the "burglars" are forced to endure.
I use quotes because the "antagonists" are anything but that. They're actually just a struggling family attempting to retrieve a priceless doll they believe to be stolen. Thus, instead of relishing in the pain of two would-be felons, you are essentially tasked with laughing at two broke parents. Hooray!
Not really, this whole endeavor is about as bad as taking a bag of sugar to the privates or a well-aimed pool ball to the cranium.
Hence, to watch it, you must drink. So sit back, knock down a few Big Shanty Graham Cracker Stouts from Burnt Hickory Brewing, and prime the dart gun! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Mayor McCheese, and Chumpzilla are avoiding that little jerk's boobytraps!
This Week’s Segments:
Introduction/Plot Breakdown – This movie is an absolute travesty. (00:00)
Lingering Questions – We hear from our brothers in beer at Hop Nation USA, and then lament all the idiotic gags this movie throws at you. (40:53)
The "Look What You Did, You Little Jerk" Trivia Challenge – The Double Turn Podcast rigs the turnbuckle to break, and then Chumpzilla challenges the field to trivia about the movie. (1:04:12)
Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We continue "Hops and Jingle Bell Flops" with Out Cold, which isn't technically a Christmas movie, but there's snow in it! (1:12:06)
And, as always, hit us up on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram to check out all the interesting factoids—why this clown show happened and more—from this week’s episode!
You can find this episode of Hops and Box Office Flops on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, Podbean, Spotify, Acast, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Vurbl, and Amazon Music!

Terminator Genisys – Rotten Member Berries

Terminator Genisys is a hodgepodge of ideas from more beloved Terminator films. It gives us the gruff and tough Sarah Connor, as well as the sleek and dangerous T-1000; and it even features an Arnold versus Arnold face-off in 1984 amid the familiar backdrop of the original T-800's arrival. There's only one issue: None of it particularly works.
Terminator Genisys feels more like half-baked fan fiction than it does a coherent narrative. Thus, despite how much we all love those elements and moments from the prior movies, they come across as shameless pandering here. Pair that with a convoluted script that hops through time more often than Dr. Sam Beckett, and it's a recipe for reboot disaster.
Now, it's not all bad. There are some good ideas in Terminator Genisys. Establishing connective technology as sort of a Trojan horse for Skynet is not without its merits. But, there is just so much happening that is uninteresting. With two leads (Emilia Clarke as Sarah Connor and Jai Courtney as Kyle Reese) who lack even a semblance of chemistry, those flaws become even more apparent.
Hence why this movie bombed with critics and domestic audiences. It sits at 27% on Rotten Tomatoes with 274 reviews; and it grossed just $89.7 million in North America. Its global cume helped it save face ($440.6 million), but it was still not enough to keep it out of the red.
Listen, you could watch this, but these versions of the characters won't be back. So come with us if you want to drink some future-infused Spaten Optimator, while hunting down those goddamn time traveling robots! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Capt. Cash, and Chumpzilla are tumbling through time in our birthday suits!
This Week’s Segments:
Introduction/Plot Breakdown – Woof ... where to begin? Never has a movie failed so hard to grasp what made the fans love the characters of its series. (00:00)
Lingering Questions – The Double Turn Podcast heads to 1997 to prevent the Montreal Screwjob, and then we discuss what could've fixed this travesty. (53:23)
The "Judgement Day" Trivia Challenge – We hear from our brothers in beer at Hop Nation USA, and then I challenge the field to trivia about the movie. (1:19:11)
Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We kick off "Hops and Jingle Bell Flops" with a movie that will make you root for the burglars, Home Sweet Home Alone! (1:32:23)
And, as always, hit us up on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram to check out all the interesting factoids—the aborted sequels and more—from this week’s episode!
You can find this episode of Hops and Box Office Flops on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, Podbean, Spotify, Acast, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Vurbl, and Amazon Music!

The Rocketeer – The Antifa Adventurer that isn’t Dr. Jones

The Rocketeer is a beloved 1991 Disney film. Based on Dave Stevens' comic series, which debuted in 1982, it revolves around stunt pilot Cliff Secord's (Bill Campbell) fortuitous discovery of a jetpack created by Howard Hughes. Of course, adventure ensues.
The character was created as a tribute to the 1930s serials that had inspired wonder in the youth of their day. Both the comics and film execute that homage perfectly. The Rocketeer is indeed a cult classic. Loaded with charm—which is anchored by the majestic score of James Horner—it serves as a delightful reminder of the comic book films of yesteryear. Those films had to rely far less on CGI and far more on making the viewers organically believe in the magic they were presenting.
They also had a much slimmer margin for error. They weren't the commodity they are now, so there wasn't an excess of "superhero" cinema.
Unfortunately for The Rocketeer, it failed to take flight at the box office. It grossed just $46.7 million on a budget of $40 million, sending the sequel plans to the crap heap.
The good news: Despite some dodgy green screen here and there, it remains a very enjoyable time; and its enduring appeal seems to be leading to a sequel series for Disney+!
So sit back, blast off with a Hazecraft IPA from Great Lakes Brewing Co., and don't let Lothar snap you in half! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Capt. Cash and two special guests are punching Nazis and crashing zeppelins!
This Week’s Segments:
Introduction/Plot Breakdown – 30 years later, The Rocketeer still packs plenty of fun. (00:00)
Lingering Questions – The Double Turn Podcast tunes up the band, and then we discuss why this film should've soared, rather than crashed, at the box office. (56:16)
The "Rocket Man" Trivia Challenge – We hear from our brothers in beer at Hop Nation USA, and then Capt. Cash challenges the field to trivia about the movie. (1:14:42)
Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We finish off "Hops and Attempted Franchise Flops" with the least self-aware Skynet creation, Terminator Genisys! (1:22:10)
And, as always, hit us up on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram to check out all the interesting factoids—the upcoming reboot and more—from this week’s episode!
You can find this episode of Hops and Box Office Flops on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, Podbean, Spotify, Acast, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Vurbl, and Amazon Music!

Snake Eyes – Crapped Out

Snake Eyes continues the unfortunate legacy of the legendary G.I. Joe toys on film. As in, it's not particularly good, nor was it successful.
Snake Eyes, like many films nowadays, is meant to serve as an origin story for its titular hero, but also as an introduction to a larger universe. We get appearances from Cobra's Baroness, as well as the classic Joe Scarlett. The issue is they don't necessarily fit. They are crammed into what's already a messy film.
Thus, they are shortchanged and underdeveloped. What is developed is the film's inability to make Snake Eyes, played by Henry Golding, particularly endearing. From the jump, his motivations and behavior establish him as almost a villain, especially when compared to Tommy, future Storm Shadow (Andrew Koji).
In more trustworthy hands, Snake Eyes' dilemma and traitorous actions may have seemed tortured, something the audience could empathize with. The script here just doesn't allow for that. Instead, he comes across as a jerk for nearly the entire runtime. It's honestly one of the stranger attempts at a Hero's Journey I've ever seen.
Couple that with a shaky cam that even Paul Greengrass would find offensive, a MacGuffin too stupid for even Cobra Commander to want, and a gaggle of giant snakes not murdering Jon Voigt, you've got yourself a fairly painful night at the movies.
Critics and audiences seem to agree. With 170 reviews, it sits at 36% on Rotten Tomatoes; and it grossed a measly $40.1 million on a budget ranging from $88 to $110 million. That, folks, is disastrous.
Anyway, now you know and knowing is half the battle. So sit back, kanpai with an Asahi Super Dry, and don't jump into the snake pit! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Chumpzilla, and Capt. Cash are overstuffing fish with guns for the Yakuza!
This Week’s Segments:
Introduction/Plot Breakdown – Seems like an odd choice to make Snake Eyes the least likable character in your Snake Eyes movie. (00:00)
Lingering Questions – We hear from our brothers in beer at Hop Nation USA, and then we offer our ideas for which cartoon episode or arc would make a great movie. (33:20)
The "Three Challenges of the Warrior" Quiz – The Double Turn Podcast gets DQ'd because of outside interference, and then I challenge the field to trivia about the movie. (56:23)
Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We continue "Hops and Attempted Franchise Flops" with the beloved 90s flick The Rocketeer! (1:06:21)
And, as always, hit us up on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram to check out all the interesting factoids—the Hasbro Movie Universe and more—from this week’s episode!
You can find this episode of Hops and Box Office Flops on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, Podbean, Spotify, Acast, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Vurbl, and Amazon Music!